Naughty 1 and Naughty 2...

Don't misunderstand, they are both EQUALLY NAUGHTY, but I used numbers to distinguish between the two.
Tonight I made the error of taking two children to the grocery store. WalMart of all places. The most cluttered, toy filled, little gadget, piece of candy here and there, store in the UNIVERSE! I take my kids to the grocery store all the time... but tonight... let's just say it was an experience that will plague me for a VERY LONG TIME! They were naughty... no really... like strangers staring at me with that "Holy crap woman, CONTROL YOUR KIDS!" look. Yeah,.... it was one of those experiences.
I only share it because frankly, I am miffed...REALLY REALLY REALLY MIFFED! Here's the rundown....
1. Walk in the store... Jake wants in the cart, so I put him in, keep in mind he is 42 lbs, not exactly light!!! Then 2 seconds later he pitches a fit because now he wants out!!!! (I should have known I was in for it AND RAN!!!!)
2. We go to produce (I don't like the Walmart Produce...but never the less it was convenient) I pick out some nectarines that were pretty good, and of course the boys fight over who gets to hold them.
3. Off to frozen foods... Jake decides this would be a great time to try and hang upside down on the cart as if it were a jungle gym... he gets grease ALL OVER his hands and starts pitching a fit that his hands are dirty... (yeah cuz I didn't warn you about that along with the fact that you are going to fall and bust your face!!!!)
4. After a few more minutes we end up in the Health/beauty aisle. By now, Joe has thrown enough of a tantrum that I agree to let him walk instead of sit in the cart. BIG MISTAKE! He runs up and down the aisle knocking stuff on the floor then refusing to pick it up!!! (this is where those nasty looks come in!) After getting firm with him and his ignoring me... I tap him on the toosh. Yes I really did that in a store!!!! HE LAUGHED!!!!
5. Finally we go to the checkout... this should be peaceful right???? NO!!!! Joe takes my nice nectarines out of the cart and decides to bowl them down the checkout aisle! So now, not only have I checked out and didn't notice that he had taken them out of the cart... but now I get to pay for BRUISED FRUIT! (Insert SCREAM HERE!)
Essentially the kids were locked in their rooms when we got home til Turtle got home... unfortunately that was less than 5 minutes later!!!